(Almost) 50 years ago...

It was on 9-06-59 we came to know Pattabi (I call him chittappa). It was the Janvasam day of Lakshmi chitti‘s wedding, which was the next day. On that day there was heavy rain. Fortunately preparation at Gaddi Adduppu was over by then and so the evening function went off well. We were all trying to clear the mess caused by the rain when a soft voice behind us said “can we also join you”? It was from the groom’s party of course. We set it right, despite the wet fire place and things were set right by 11pm with the help of my senior co brothers. Some of the invitees had to wade through knee deep water. But all the groom's party took it with smile though we were a bit nervous. That was my first experience & has been my continuing experience with chitappa

Myself & Nagaraja periappa (our senior brother in law) are very short tempered & whenever there is an argument there will be loss of temper on both sides. Natraja perippa & Pattabi chitappa were the peacemakers to reduce the heat. Natraj perippa laugh was loud & visible even from a distance (you see him shaking) whereas chitappa’s is docile yet piercing. We lost vakadai perippa in 1965 now the other peace maker is lost. I just leave it you to imagine my heart's condition.

While writing about chitappa I remember one story I use to tell my children. Gajendra, the elephant was caught by a crocodile and after a long struggle it called out to the lord. The lord just rushed to the spot without informing his consort, without his chakkara & without garuda. In case of any need in our family chitti & chitappa would both be by us even without our calling.

I do not want to get emotional . But let us try the way chitappa used to console ourself

Kannan (MVP's brother in law, Lakshmi's sister Sushila's husband)
Coimbatore 10-06-08

A Marriage made in heaven

It has been forty eight years since that hail storm on the 10th of June in Secunderabad when Pattabhiraman and Lakhsmi were joined together in marriage. I hear from people that witnessed that event that they had never seen rain like that. I take it the event was thoroughly blessed by the heavens.

Many if not most of the couples in the puranas continue their partnership thru many ages. Life is no barrier to their companionship, they are soul-mates; it is merely a transition point to the next role that they have to play. I cannot think of a couple closer to that idea than my own parents. Maybe the comparison seems too far fetched, but I suspect that most people really agree with me.

There are couples and then there are couples. Some take years to understand each other and reach a compromise and understanding, some never ever get there, and then there are some who are like two professional dancers. They anticipate the partners move and are not only in position, but thinking one step ahead. There is no give and take in this partnership, just give. Both only give; the taking is left to someone else for they know that a true partnership can only be born out of complete commitment and sacrifice for each others cause. The deep desire is to complete the other person and fulfill the partners’ needs, for that is what gives them the true satisfaction. Separate, yet together, almost to the point of being inseparable.

A man and a woman joined in holy matrimony, to have and to hold, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer; what God has joined together, let no man put asunder. And till eternity shall it last!!

Dearest Amma (and Appa), on this very special day, I salute and celebrate with great honor, the wonderful bond that you have created, for its ripples will be felt for ages!!

a professor remembers his graduate student, and a student remembers his professor

Prof Peter Lancaster of the University of Calgary was Appa's PhD advisor and Appa was his first graduate student. He shared this memory with us:

I remember Raman with great fondness--my very first PhD student! We were good friends and he maintained a happy disposition and high personal standards as long as I knew him. I remember in the 1960s when he was the only person who, in a Calgary winter, would cross the campus with no coat on!

The world is a better place for his part in it.

Appa obtained his doctorate in 1968 from the University of Calgary in an area of number theory called functional analysis.

Many of his students too have shared memories with us. Prof V Ganeshan, formerly with the CIEFL in Hyderabad, sent this message--

Deeply saddened to hear about the death of your father and my teacher, Prof. Pattabhiraman, I am writing these lines to extend my heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

I had the greatest respect for your father. As you know he was my friend and guide whenever I had to face challenges as an administrator of CIEFL.

He was, as a teacher and a human being, a great source of knowledge and strength to everyone around him and I used feel fortunate to interact with him as often as I could. He was very highly respected throughout the teaching community. His good works, timely advice and help changed the life of many.

He shares this poem with us, and with all those who have lost a loved one...

TO THOSE I LOVE AND THOSE WHO LOVE ME

When I am gone, release me, and let me go….
I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn’t tie yourself to me with tears;
Be happy that we had so many years.

I gave to you my love, you can only guess
how much you gave me in Happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown
but now it’s time I traveled on alone.

To grieve a while for me if grieve you must;
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It’s only for a while that we must part,
So bless the memories within your heart.

I won’t be far away, for life goes on;
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can’t see me or touch me, I’ll be near
and if you listen with your heart, you’ll hear,
all of my love around you soft and clear.

And then, when you must come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile and say,
“Welcome Home”

- Author Unknown