a professor remembers his graduate student, and a student remembers his professor

Prof Peter Lancaster of the University of Calgary was Appa's PhD advisor and Appa was his first graduate student. He shared this memory with us:

I remember Raman with great fondness--my very first PhD student! We were good friends and he maintained a happy disposition and high personal standards as long as I knew him. I remember in the 1960s when he was the only person who, in a Calgary winter, would cross the campus with no coat on!

The world is a better place for his part in it.

Appa obtained his doctorate in 1968 from the University of Calgary in an area of number theory called functional analysis.

Many of his students too have shared memories with us. Prof V Ganeshan, formerly with the CIEFL in Hyderabad, sent this message--

Deeply saddened to hear about the death of your father and my teacher, Prof. Pattabhiraman, I am writing these lines to extend my heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

I had the greatest respect for your father. As you know he was my friend and guide whenever I had to face challenges as an administrator of CIEFL.

He was, as a teacher and a human being, a great source of knowledge and strength to everyone around him and I used feel fortunate to interact with him as often as I could. He was very highly respected throughout the teaching community. His good works, timely advice and help changed the life of many.

He shares this poem with us, and with all those who have lost a loved one...

TO THOSE I LOVE AND THOSE WHO LOVE ME

When I am gone, release me, and let me go….
I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn’t tie yourself to me with tears;
Be happy that we had so many years.

I gave to you my love, you can only guess
how much you gave me in Happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown
but now it’s time I traveled on alone.

To grieve a while for me if grieve you must;
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It’s only for a while that we must part,
So bless the memories within your heart.

I won’t be far away, for life goes on;
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can’t see me or touch me, I’ll be near
and if you listen with your heart, you’ll hear,
all of my love around you soft and clear.

And then, when you must come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile and say,
“Welcome Home”

- Author Unknown

The Everlasting Wave

It was a Saturday night, almost a month ago now. We were in Albany, New York, talking to a group of people at a conference. Unbeknownst to me, at the same time, appa was getting reading to leave home for a swim at the Country Club in Begumpet. He was eager to get back to his routine after having been away from his normal routine for two weeks due to the biopsy that he had done on his ankle to figure out what was wrong with it. I don't think anyone including him had the faintest thought that the end was so near. Yet somehow, as things panned out over the next couple of days, he transitioned to the Great Beyond just like he did everything else in life, with a minimum of fuss and with a smile on his face. The pain that he felt in his ankle was real, but not any more real and definitely not greater than the joy he took in filling his day with activities that meant everything to him, not any more real than the disarming smile on his face which seemed to reflect the state of his soul.

I have never known a "younger" old man. He's been that way ever since I could remember and never quite aged as a person. The entity that was my dad, was always greater than the physical person. Maybe that is why, I feel he is still living amongst us. His childlike eagerness to greet each morning with his asanas, the enthusiasm to look forward to the upcoming events and people, his constant interest in knowing more about everything, the concern for his family's well being, the obsessive interest in cricket and chess, the joy of planning a trip for himself and others, the total involvement in his music; they all played a part in keeping him young and forward looking. I think (and know) he believed in living every day, and never wanted the thought of 'The End' to stop him from enjoying his living. Perhaps that is why he was defiant to the very end about giving into the pain he felt in his ankle and knees. He was not going to let even his body dictate the terms of his life. Now looking back, somehow, he has succeeded in living, more than a lot of us who are still 'alive', here and now, thru the apparent end.

I look at the pictures and I sometimes feel the despairing urge to see him in the flesh again, to be next to him, to talk to him, and yet in some strange way, there was a completeness to his life, much like a gentle wave that retracts from the beach having made its long journey across the ocean to the shore, as if its only purpose was to soothe your feet. The wave reached the shore and dissolved back into the ocean, but somehow passed on its essence to you. I suspect that he had much the same effect on people; a quiet and soothing presence. An effect that is felt more only when it is absent.

Talking about my dad is however like saying only half the story. The substance and strength of his convictions came from the immense devotion, love and unconditional support that my mother has always showered on him and also on the rest of the family. His sense of gratitude towards her was equally awesome. I am sure a lot of people have evidenced this phenomenal partnership. For Runa and myself and undoubtedly for a lot of people in our extended family, they have both been a great inspiration and a source of comfort and strength.

If appa's life was his message, then my mom is the very medium that delivered it with high fidelity. Its a message that she will always continue to deliver because it has now become an indistinguishable part of her.

As a son, as their child, what more can I ever ask of my parents than to show me by their own example as to how to live life, and live it so well! I know there are a great many things still to be encountered and experienced in my life, and the comfort of knowning "what would appa do?" only increases my urgency to move headlong into the future.

MVP Old Pictures

Memories from Roy Choudury

Appa had a way with people and he never allowed traditional relations or cultural differences be a barrier to developing great relationships, in fact he enjoyed being the contrarian in these respects. It was very evident in his relationship with his 'Bengali' sambandhi's. Here is what Ranjit Roy Choudhury has to say about MVP.

"Memories keep the one you loved close to you in spirit and thought and always in your heart. I am sure everyone who knew Dr. Raman including Monju and me will find comfort in remembering each moment spent in his company.

He was a man with vast knowledge and varied interests, yet his quest for knowledge never seemed to end. Even at his age, it was remarkable to see him making a serious effort to learn Bengali and succeeding to some extent. He asked me for a Bengali magazine and to my great surprise within a few days he read out a few lines to me from it. What a remarkable man!

We share our thoughts on various subjects, from cricket to carnatic and hindustani music, comparing the various ragas. He was like my elder brother whom I could ask for any kind of help or advise whenever I needed it most. As long as he was there, we felt so secure.

It is so hard to reconcile to the fact that we will no longer see his ever smiling face. We know that grief and tragedy are only for a time; but his goodness and unconditional love which he showered on us will forever remain in our hearts. We will always be thankful both to him and Lakshmi for making us feel so much a part of their family. "

Ranjit (Roy Choudhury)

(sambandhi)

More Memories...

It's not often that inlaws have more than a "politely cordial" relationship. Subhashini Subrahmanian has this to say about her "sambandhi"--

I don't know how to write about him. There were so many good qualities about him to write. The name of the house, "Ayodhya" is perfect for the house. His name Raman also suits not only the person, but symbolises all the qualities which Lord Rama had, which he too had. Soft spoken, always smiling, ready to help anyone--known or unknown. On festival days or any special days the sweets and vada which we prepare in the house, he insisted, should be given first to the watchman and the servants, and unless this was given he would not eat.

He loved music, cricket and playing chess on the computer. I would go along with him and Lakshmi to all the music concerts. If we had any doubt about identifying the raga, he used to tell us immediately. He had a music diary in which he wrote down the name of the song and the ragam. Sometimes I used to feel tired to go to a concert and he used to say, "Come for as long as you can sit and listen to the music. When you are tired we can come back." After returning if I said "Thank you", he would say, with a big smile, "Thanks for the company!" He wanted others to enjoy everything he did.

Whenever he came upstairs (we live in one house, on two floors) to eat with us, after the meal he used to say "Thank you" which I refused to accept. Immediately he changed this to "No thank you", said with a smile.

When I travelled to Chennai by train, which was quite often, he wrote down the time table for me from Secunderabad to Chennai and the return journey, by both the Chennai Express and Charminar Express--I still keep that sheet of paper with me in my travel handbag, encased in clear plastic, to check the progress of the train and the stations on the way!

He used to ask the children--his granddaughters Achala and Ananya--to translate English words to Tamil and the other way round, and this was often quite comical (elimichcham pazham became rat remainder fruit!) and made them laugh.

I can go on writing--these are just a few of those memories. We will all miss him.

The Life and Times of Dr. M.V.Pattabhiraman

Name: Mangalam Vaidyanatha Sastry Pattabhiraman
Place of Birth: Begumpet, Hyderabad
Date of Birth: January 1st, 1931
Died: April 21st, 2008
Father: Vaidynatha Sastry (Pattanna)
Mother: Kamakshi (chitti)

Education:
Mehboob College, Secunderabad
Nizam College, Hyderabad (B.A Mathematics)
Osmania University Arts College, Hyderabad (M.A Mathematics)
University of Calgary, Alberta, Canada (Ph.D Mathematics)

Married: June 10th, 1959
Wife: Lakshmi Raman (Ranganathan - maiden name)
Children:
Usha Raman (daughter born Sept. 1960)
Rajasekhar Raman (son born Nov. 1968)

There are of course many, many, many more significant events and people in the life of MVP Raman. The hope is that people who were part of his life will take the time to recount some of their memories and thoughts on this blog. We would like to have everyone contribute.

Please pass on this blog site to anyone you think would like to add their comments.